The noises were starting to frighten me and where getting louder , my girls were in the next room, but I was too scared to get out of bed. After all it was 1am and the monster under the bed is hungry at that hour.
I then realised I was the man of the house, I was the adult. In the dark I grabbed my brave cape leapt from my bed, so the bed monsters couldn’t grab may ankles and went flying down the hall way turning even single light on in my unit.
Once I realised the noise wasn’t from a person I set about looking for it, until I got closer to the fridge. I stood next to the fridge , heart pounding in my throat. I was half expecting a demon to jump out at me as I opened the freezer door, I have watched too many horror films. Instead a gecko lept out and scurried across the floor leaving me in a wake of screams before I had a heart attack as I slid down the wall into a crumpled anxious mess on the floor. I assure you a fridge ghost would of received the same response if it was to jump out at me.
This was the moment I realised I was the adult, I was the person my girls depended on to keep them safe, fed , watered and bathed. I was it ,and here I was screaming at a gecko, watch out world the tough mother has arrived. Since when did I become an adult ?
Between hand washing school uniforms, cooking spaghetti, doing home work and trying to shave my legs in the shower with two kids at my feet, I was now expected to act as an adult in society whilst fighting off geckos all so I could be a good role model to my kids.
If I don’t cook, we have to eat 2 minute soup and if I don’t do the dishes we have to eat that 2 minute soup from the packet. All of a sudden I felt like I had too much responsibility. I wasn’t adult enough to be the only adult in the room, but when I tipped a pot of spaghetti on the floor and the girls started laughing hysterically at me, I realised I didn’t need to be a serious adult. My girls are happy that I am chaotic and fun. When they go to sleep at night they are confident that I am a heroic gecko slayer. They sleep so soundly, knowing I am there. Little do they know, that I sleep with the light on because I am afraid of the dark, yes news flash ! ADULTS can still be afraid of the dark
I don’t need to fit into the worlds idea of a good single mum, I just needed to fit into my girls idea of an awesome mum and give them all the love they need, and that is one job I am good at.